Mother's Day

When I was a kid in school, our teachers would help us make gifts for our moms for Mother's Day.  The trouble for me, was that for for a very long time, I didn't have a Mom.  So, my teachers being the sensitive people that they were, had me make Mother's Day cards and presents for my Dad.

And so the tradition began.  Every year, my Dad would get a bunch of drawings (I remember the "supermom" card the most- a card with a drawing of my Daddy dressed as superman, thanking him for being both my Mommy and Daddy), and he'd make a super big deal about how fabulous they were.  My Dad is a remarkable person, and is a great father.  For many years, he was Mom/Dad/Friend. 

Then one day, my Dad met Barbara.  Fiery, serious, but silly, artistic, organized, creative, loving and fun.  She became my Mom.  I don't think I'd really realized it at the time, but once she walked into my life, she was never really going to leave.  Truthfully, I'm sometimes surprised she's still there.  I wasn't the easiest teenager.  I don't mean that I was a druggie, or that I got around.  I didn't steal or do lots of crazy things.  But I think now that I'm a Mom, I can realize how much worse what I did was.  I played push me/pull me.  I'd let her in, and then I'd shut her out.  I wasn't that kid that screamed and cursed.  I just looked at my feet and said "I don't know" like a mantra.  I think silent emotional warfare is much more frightening than a kid that's willing to curse you out.  At least then you get some kind of clue as to what's going on with them.

Barbara was a good mom to my pain-in-the-rear, angst-ridden teenage self.  She tried her best to protect me from the bad things in my life (my birth mother the psychopath, among other things), as well as from myself.  Because regardless of whether or not you have given birth to someone, THAT'S what a Mom does.

I wish that I had called her Mom earlier in our relationship.  I wish I could have given her that.  Goodness knows she deserved it.  But I can say, I'll never forget calling her Mom for the first time, and the look on her face.  I'll never forget when I adopted her and wrote it in her Mother's Day card.  Or when she held my hand while I had my baby.  She's my Supermom, my rock, my safe place, and my friend.

It's funny, because I have so few mom-related Mother's Days in my memory.  The first Mom-related one that I have is when she and I went shopping for my college graduation outfit.  I'm pretty sure that was the last year I gave my Dad something for Mother's Day, and that after that, Mother's Day was only about my Mom.

Mother's Day isn't just to celebrate moms.  It's to celebrate everyone in your life that has filled a "mom space" for you.  Sometimes it's Daddy.  Sometimes it's Mommy.  Sometimes it's your best friend's mom, or your grandmother.  The point is that someone woke up one day and said "Hey!  A little appreciation is needed here!"  So maybe, just maybe, we could all start to be a little more appreciative.  A little more thankful.  Everyday.

Wouldn't that be something?

Tomorrow's post will be by Kyle.  He's sharing what he made for Mother's Day (from my yummy breakfast in bed, to the super delicious burgers he made me and my Mom!)